I have lost the hope I used to cling to. As I sit in the bathroom, my only place where I am calm and undisturbed, I look ahead of me at the shower tiles. The tears have stopped now but peeling off my glasses I see the evidence of my heartache. I am cold and numb. And for the first time in my life I wish I had never been born. Call me melodramatic but all I am is tired. All I want to do is sleep without him on my mind: prospects of us being together, holding each other close. Burned to a cinder. I am ripped. I am damaged and I need someone to carry me over this obstacle. I could grow a pair and move on but I can't face the next hurdle alone.
He'll never through, the bastard. They never do.
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